Ok, so today is going to be a bit different. As Friday was approaching I kept racking my brain about what my favourite things were this week. I know, I know – there are a lot of you that love the “must have” jogging pants or latest running shoe (trust me – I love them too) but these past few weeks have been a different vibe for me. One of calm, focus, clarity and clearing out – huh?
I say it a lot – that you need to make a decision and then take action. You know, instead of sitting around over thinking it, making pros and cons lists and all of the other stuff that doesn’t matter. You need to follow that gut feeling that KNOWS the answer that you are looking for. A few weeks ago I made what feels like a big one. A decision that was part of my 3-5 year plan (by “5” I really meant “10” – I was hoping that a few things would get thrown into the mix to delay it….because if you say “5” it means you have breathing room, otherwise known as staying in your comfort zone) suddenly meant that I had to start taking action – because after all, you can’t practice what you don’t preach yourself.
So part of this plan means that I need to create some space – like physical space. I am in that stage in life when my kids have outgrown the highchairs, playpens, baby toys…..and the list goes on and on. I am different than most (based on the discussions I have had with other moms). I don’t want to toss the diaper genie to the curb, nor any other “thing” that you kinda need on hand with having a baby. I struggled for years to have our kids and without getting too emotional about it – I’m not sure if I will ever be left with the feeling of being “done” with having kids simply because for years I didn’t know if we would have any. So while all of you are celebrating being done with that last diaper, I’m struggling to hold onto just about everything “just in case”.
So what did I do? I played phone tag with my BFF all week up until about an hour ago. She’s my perspective when I can’t seem to find it. On the edge of tears I said “I just feel like by getting rid of all of this stuff I am closing a chapter that I don’t know if I am ready to be done with”. Without hesitation she said this “No, you are creating space for a new chapter. It doesn’t mean the book is closed and it doesn’t mean that there isn’t more to be written. It’s just a new chapter and you need to create space for it”. I know right, she’s pretty amazing.
So here are my favourite things this week, which are not at all things at all (I promise I will round it would with superficial must-haves next week):
Perspective. When you are struggling to figure something out, try looking at it from a different perspective. Look within, or look to someone else to help you see it. Sometimes all it takes is a 5 minute conversation to completely change your outlook on something.
Create Space. Literally. Whether it be on your calendar, in your head or in your home. Start getting rid of all of the crap that does not serve you. Start with the stuff (it’s way easier to start here). Clean out your closet, cupboards, garage – whatever. I don’t mean just tidy, I mean like grab a bunch of garbage bags and start throwing stuff out. You might think it’s just stuff – but it’s not. You’ll see what I mean when you start to do it. It’s like a weight is lifted off of you, literally. One you clear the clutter you can start working on other areas.
Say Yes. It’s my Year of Yes – have you not heard? Since committing to this I have realized just how much I say “no”. Like astonishing how much. I do actually think it’s a combination between being a bit of a control freak (like, it has to be my idea and unless it is I want to say no – it’s weird I know) but the other half to this is because it’s easier to say no and just stay in your cushy comfort zone. I cannot tell you how many times I have “had” to say “yes” these past few weeks. Every single time my heart started to race and I instantly started to go into panic mode – and then I would say to myself “what’s the worst that can happen”. You know what the answer is? feeling like an idiot or looking dumb, or whatever other judgy word you can come up with. In other words “failing by whatever ridiculous” standards ‘I’ am holding myself to” – no one else, me. YOU are your biggest challenge, obstacle and judge. Start saying yes, or at the very least start noticing when you say “no” and then figure out why. Be honest with yourself. I bet you the answer falls in line with my lame excuses.
What are some of your favourite things this week?